Careful Where You Step: The First Date

There are few moments in life when all you get is one shot, (a charging rhinoceros, one bowling ball for a perfect game) where one miscue or misstep and that’s it, game over.

And the first date certainly falls into that category. While you may be able recover, many are the men and women, who stare out the window on a rainy night and wonder how things might have turned out differently if they hadn’t called the waitress "baby," had a few too many and danced like Tina Turner, came up empty at check-time, or the old classic; vomited out the car door.



Best Foot Forward



Six hundred years ago Chaucer wrote, " Women desire six things: they want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient and lively in bed." Thankfully the passing centuries have taught women not to expect it all. Still, in preparing for that first date boys, it is a good idea to look your best, have ample cash, or valid credit card(men should always pick up the tab on the first date) and even an idea of things you should say about yourself or ask with genuine interest.

And ladies, don’t appear too desperate, or obsessive, for often it is our imperfections which are most attractive. It’s a good idea not to talk about yourself too much and then ask, "So…what do you think about me?"



After the Fact



The first date is either a positive experience or it isn’t. If positive, don’t appear too eager or demanding, this can sabotage the good feelings that have been established. If negative, be honest, everyone involved knows dating is a tough game. Don’t disappear, call back, provide closure, let the other know that you had a good time, but you’ve decided to stay on the sidelines for a bit. While honesty is essential, when it comes to letdowns, a little white lie is perhaps the best way to go.





Need dating advice? Check out Neil Strauss.